i feel like i keep talking about the same topic over and over, but it’s what’s on my mind! these thoughts are pretty similar to what i have written on thoughtful computing or even starting a digital garden. but this is my website so the whole point is to do what i want, which brings me to today’s topic: doing what i want
the internet is simply less fun today than when i was younger. back in the good ol’ days, the internet was for fun games, making cool images, and exploring interesting topics for the rare elementary research project. the computer even had its own place in the house, and i would beg my parents and fight my siblings to get to use it. now, i find myself scared of my laptop sometimes. the internet seems to be for social media and stressful schoolwork and distracting myself to kill time.
there seems to be one key difference, i lost ownership of my time online. tik tok and instagram are designed to hijack our time by whatever means necessary. i recently deleted twitter (really can’t get myself to call it x) because i was simply overwhelmed with ads and curated feeds to play with my emotions. the time i spend online simply doesn’t feel in my control anymore.
so, i want to take it back. i have been finding simple ways to create a more curated experience for myself, and feel more included as well. sometimes, social media feels like it is for the influencers or others who possess a special authority that i don’t. but that doesn’t feel fair, and it doesn’t have to be true.
i created this website to sort of set myself free. maybe i’ll be really into it for a week then forget. maybe i’ll become dedicated to using this platform and keep it going for years. the best part is that it is my choice only. there are no analytics or anything here, so i might even be screaming into the void. but regardless, this exploration feels fun and it feels like mine, and thats’s empowering.